Social Networking Etiquette (In case you didn’t know!) By Linsy Guerrero, Social Networking Editor Linsy's Bio     Email article     RSS feed      Share on  facebook

SO…..I lost my job two weeks ago which I recently noticed seems to be happening all around me. As an upside to the situation, I happen to be well networked! I immediately reached out to my friends and contacts to see what might come up. As a result, I was overwhelmed with responses. I have been approached to sell insurance, financial products, Mary Kay, just to name a few among a multitude of sales opportunities. I have also been offered a career back in the recruiting industry, not to mention I have an interview coming up to help manage someone’s rental properties on St. Petersburg Beach. Needless to say, it is definitely about “who you know”. I do have to believe that I made a positive impression on these individuals in the first place who have reached out to me. With people abusing their social networks by email blasting everyone they meet ALL the time, why did they choose to read my email? It could have looked like ordinary spam, or just ANOTHER email. After giving this much thought, I figured out a few things……….

What NOT to do

When in the beginning months of getting out and networking for my former employer, I joined many different social and business networking groups to hit the ground running so to speak. One of the things I learned very fast was that leads groups did not work as well for what I was trying to accomplish through networking. There was also something to be learned from one particular member of one of the leads groups I was attending. To preface this story a little, one of my leads groups was only around nine members when I first joined it and though it grew, it did so slowly. If you know nothing about how leads groups work in general, let me expand briefly. They are usually business networking groups that meet once a week and only allow one member of a particular industry to join (for example, there can only be one real estate agent, travel agent, financial advisor, etc.). The point is that the one individual from their industry must be the one that the group passes their leads and referrals to for that particular good or service. It is supposedly a guaranteed way to generate revenue for the members in the group. One day I made the mistake of sending out an email and accidentally not blind copying my recipients. The chiropractor in my leads group took FULL advantage of this and copied ALL of my contacts, which happened to be a combination of personal and business. Needless to say, this became one phone call after another, following several emails all asking, “Who is Dr. X, (which we will call him) and WHY is he emailing me nonstop??”

I immediately put in a phone call to my leads buddy and asked him why he contacted my email recipients, which he clearly copied and pasted into his own personal list. He said it was an accident and that he didn’t “mean to”. After he apologized profusely, I simply asked him to remove their names from his list as they did not wish to receive his almost daily emails.

The right thing to do would have been to ask me first to see if I thought some of my friends and family would like to be on his list or hear about his services. I would have not only given him the names of several people on that email that may have been interested in his business, but quite a few that actually required his services. Instead, he continued to reach out to my friends and family after our conversation without my or their consent. I am not certain whether he accidentally forgot my request, or simply couldn’t find the time to do what I asked, but either way it was unbelievably unprofessional. He not only used a sneaky, usually ineffective approach to market his business, he has lost all hopes of ever receiving a good word, or referral from me again.

If you want to add to your email list of contacts, go out there and get them yourself. If you don’t have time, buy them. And for goodness sake and you don’t have money to buy a contact list or email blast, at least ASK before you steal someone else’s!

Let me go one step further with all of this and suggest that even if you were to ask someone for their contacts, the professional approach is to embed a link or response form for those who would like to “opt out” of further emails from you or your business. That is a good way to keep people on your list who will actually read your emails and may contact you for your products and/or services. This leads me into a few tips that may help you use your list of contacts to their full potential.

What to do

Be memorable- NO…don’t show up to social and business networking events in your 1982 prom dress or wearing your water-squirting flower. To be memorable, you must first remember! LISTEN to the people you get an opportunity to speak with. Get to know them on a more personal level, like where they are from, how many children they have, etc... When you follow up with an email and ask how the game was, or how little Suzie did at her play, you will not only get a response, you will most likely be welcomed back into their inbox for future communication.

Keep in touch- Obviously we do not all have the time to email our lengthy list of contacts everyday, but staying in touch with people is a friendly little reminder that you are still around and interested in them. Again, this is done more effectively with a simple few lines alluding to a personal subject rather than an impersonal email announcement about your specials this month. Of course if you have the permission of the individual to send your monthly newsletter or similar correspondence to them, make sure that you do.

Be a familiar face-  Again, we do not all have the time to be out networking all day, every day, but when you do decide on which group or groups you would like to attend on a regular basis, PLAN on attending them regularly. People will remember you simply by your appearance more often than not. People will also be more inclined to respond to your communication when they feel that you are not just a “one-timer” running in and out of every networking group they can find looking for potential leads and then heading for the door as quickly as possible (to get to the next event of course).

Be conscious of your words/actions- I mentioned a brief story about this in my very first article and I can’t stress it enough. You NEVER know who you are talking to, who they might know, or how they may feel about certain things or issues. No matter how passionate you feel about Hillary Clinton, networking groups are never a good place to discuss your political views. I know this seems like a very common sense suggestion about “taboo” subjects, but I have seen it almost spew out of people’s mouths more times than I can count. Also, watch your nonverbal communication. Your eye contact, body language, use of personal space, and SO many other things are giving people impressions of you. Be careful about the vehicle you are honking at or giving rather uninviting gestures to in rush hour traffic. It could just be your next employer, mother-in-law, or judge!

I truly feel that my efforts based on the above mentioned practices kept me in good graces with my business contacts. My behaviors afforded me many solid relationships and now, many wonderful potential opportunities to explore. I am so very grateful for my network of friends. And yes, I called them friends for many of them have become just that! 

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